Jeff loves the smell of squirrel in the morning. Jeff likes to chase squirrels. The squirrels always disappear. Jeff thinks they are hiding underground in tunnels, just like the VC. Jeff does not look up.
This is the blog of Jeff the dog. Jeff is a dog! He is from Romania but now lives in the UK. He likes naps, his bed and walks. He enjoys playing in the garden and having the zoomies. He is only a bit smelly but he is very hairy.
Tuesday, April 30, 2019
Monday, April 29, 2019
Jeff's Bed
Jeff has a bed. Jeff is fed up with Blue Monkey and Quacky Duck pinching his bed. Jeff has a new sign. Jeff's sign says that nobody can pinch his bed. That means you, Blue Monkey!
Sunday, April 28, 2019
Burping Jeff
Jeff has many habits. Jeff has discovered a disgusting new one. Jeff likes to burp. Jeff is very pleased with his new burping.
Friday, April 26, 2019
DJ Jeff Drops the Beats
Jeff was an international jet setting acid house club DJ until someone stole his DJ name. Now Jeff is available for weddings, children's parties and Xmas discos. Spin that **** DJ Jeff.
Tuesday, April 23, 2019
Jeff is not the Fresh Prince
Jeff likes to have a sniff before he has a wee. Jeff likes to have a scratch after having a poo. Jeff likes to Sniff n' Wee and he likes to Scratch n' Poo. Unfortunately, Jeff does not Shake n' Vac to get the freshness back.
Sunday, April 21, 2019
Jeff has an 'E' in it.
Jeff is back from his dog holiday at Auntie Briony's. Auntie Briony has been giving Jeff tasty treats. Jeff's favourite treat is a round biscuit made by Irish Raver...sorry, Irish Rover. Auntie Briony calls them discos. We know what they really are, don't we Jeff?
Thursday, April 18, 2019
Jeff is Royalty
Jeff is on holiday with Auntie Briony. Jeff is being treated like royalty. Jeff thinks he's a superstar. Get a grip Jeff!
Tuesday, April 16, 2019
Jeff enjoys a good Farage
Jeff has been looking words up in his dictionary:
Foraging is searching for wild food resources. It affects an animal's fitness because it plays an important role in an animal's ability to survive and reproduce. Foraging theory is a branch of behavioural ecology that studies the foraging behaviour of animals in response to the environment where the animal lives.
Jeff doesn't know what this means. He thought he was looking up Faraging. Jeff enjoys a good Farage. When he's finished, we pick it up with a plastic bag and put it in the bin.
Blimey Jeff!
Jeff is not a stinky dog but Jeff sometimes has stinky ponky toxic dog breath. Jeff really isn't that bothered. Blimey Jeff!
Monday, April 15, 2019
Jeff does not like Wendy Ball
Jeff knows what he likes. Jeff likes rugby but Jeff does not like wendy ball. Jeff is a very sensible dog. Good boy Jeff!
Sunday, April 14, 2019
Jeff does not like Dog Sausage
Today Jeff is taking the dog sausage scratch and sniff challenge. Jeff does not like dog sausage. No one likes Andouille. But can Jeff tell the difference? There's no way out of this one Jeff.
Saturday, April 13, 2019
This is Blue Monkey
Jeff has a toy. It is Blue Monkey. Blue Monkey likes larging it to progressive trance club anthems and old skool acid house techno. Jeff prefers Drum and Base.
Friday, April 12, 2019
Jeff has Two Leads
John Prescott had two Jags. Jeff has two leads. Jeff gets the zoomies and likes to run off. This is why he has two leads. Jeff thinks David Cameron should have two leads as well.
Thursday, April 11, 2019
Who is Jeff?
Jeff is known by many different names. Jeffie. Jeffster. Jefferoony. Jeffy Baby. Jeffers. Jeffo. Jeffa Cakes. Jeff thinks this is all very puerile.
This is a beach. Where's Jeff?
This is a lovely beach in Brittany. Jeff is not on the beach. This is because of Brexit. Jeff does not like Brexit.
Wednesday, April 10, 2019
Jeff likes Auntie Briony
Jeff is staying with Auntie Briony. Auntie Briony is from Wales. Jeff isn't sure where Wales is but he likes Auntie Briony a lot. Auntie Briony likes daffodils, harps and rugby. Jeff is confused.
Who Killed Quacky Duck?
Jeff has a toy. It is Quacky Duck. Quacky Duck had an 'accident'. No one knows what happened to Quacky Duck. Jeff does not know what happened to Quacky Duck. Jeff will crack eventually.
Jeff is International
Jeff has friends from lots of countries. Jeff is Romanian. Kyp is from Cyprus. Tirion is from Wales. Gilbert is from England. Luckily they are all fluent in dog.
Tuesday, April 9, 2019
Jeff does not like Brexit
Jeff is from Romania. Jeff is an immigrant. Jeff is wanted in the UK by his family. Just like the other immigrants from European countries. Jeff does not like Brexit. Jeff can't go on holiday with his family because no one knows what's going on. Jeff thinks W.T.F.
Gilbert likes Jeff
Monday, April 8, 2019
Jeff likes Squirrels
This is a Squirrel. Jeff likes Squirrels. Squirrels are a bit like Ewoks. Jeff has never met an Ewok but he would probably like them too. Jeff is probably rebel scum.
Jeff does not like cats
This is a cat. Jeff does not like cats. If Jeff was OO7, the cat would be an evil mastermind who lives in a hollowed out volcano secret base.
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